I need to find out about the local building codes as they apply to holes in the ground, I need to know the maximum width and maximum depth hole that you can dig WITH OUT having to fill out any paper work AND I need to find out the local building codes as they relate to statues, works of art and movie sets.

The right person will invariably ask why?

It is at this point that that you say.

I need to dig a large cannabis leaf shaped hole in the ground, fill it with concrete and then build a 50 foot tall Bong - that's B O N G, not BOMB - on top of it.

The right persons eyes should slightly boggle at this point in time, so be sure to follow up with;

It's all part of a global cannabis catering concept and I have just secured the local rights to build a Big Bong Burger Bar and since I will need to be working very closely with you over the next month or six, I suggest you drop on over to the local Bong Site so I can graphically demonstrate exactly what we are about to do.

It is at this point that this cyber mechanism, this big bong burger bar dot com, is revealed in it's true light... as a weapon of Excaliber calibre, complete with detailed instructions on how to wwweild it like the sword of Alexander, or to phrase it in non metaphoric word symbols, this web site is the best tool that you could possibly have if you have the genuine intent to radically change the way your local community perceives Cannabis Use, Possession and Supply. Because it cannot be stressed enough that a Big Bong Burger Bar is primarily a mechanism for the responsible reintegration of cannabis back into society.

It is also at this point that you may decide to build a single story statue, with foundations only as deep as the minimum allowed with out paper work, I mean, you may not want cater for other cannabists, you may only want to build a garden shed sized self contained air conditioning chamber, a place where you can smoke 'to your lungs content' without any of your exhaled smoke reaching the 'mainstream air stream" which of course, is what I am planning to build in my own backyard, after I have built a few Big ones first that is.....